About Tonari

The Real Story

I'm terrible at habits. Like, genuinely bad at them.

I've downloaded probably 15 different habit trackers over the years. Each time thinking "this is the one that'll finally make me consistent." I'd track my morning routine for a week, maybe two. Then I'd miss a day, feel guilty about breaking my streak, and just... stop opening the app.

The worst part? These apps would keep sending me notifications. "You haven't logged your habits today!" Thanks, I'm aware. That's exactly why I'm avoiding you.

What Actually Worked (Sort Of)

The only "habit" I've actually stuck with is learning Japanese on Duolingo. I've been at it for over a year now, which is honestly shocking to me. And the weird thing is, I've broken my streak multiple times. But somehow, I always come back.

I started paying attention to why. Duolingo doesn't just remind me to practice—it seems to know when I'm likely to practice. It sends different types of messages depending on what's happening. Sometimes it's encouraging, sometimes it's a gentle guilt trip, sometimes it just gives me interesting facts about Japan.

Turns out, Duolingo uses these things called "bandit algorithms" that basically experiment on you to figure out what actually motivates you. Which sounds creepy but honestly works.

The Problem With Most Habit Apps

Here's what I realized: most habit trackers are just fancy to-do lists. They track what you do, but they don't learn anything about you. They send the same generic notifications to everyone. They make you feel like crap when you miss days. And they definitely don't understand that I'm way more motivated by "you're about to lose your streak" than "great job building healthy habits!"

I wanted something that actually paid attention to what worked for me specifically, not what works for people in general.

What I Built

Tonari is basically my attempt to solve this for myself (and hopefully you too). It's a habit tracker, but one that actually learns how you work.

What It's Not

Look, this isn't magic. It's not going to suddenly make you perfect at habits. I still skip days sometimes. But it's the first habit tracker I've actually kept using, and more importantly, the first one that helped me get back on track instead of giving up entirely.

It's also not for everyone. If you like simple, minimal apps, this might be too much. If you don't want an AI coach talking to you, you'll probably find it annoying.

The Honest Truth

Building habits is hard. Most people struggle with it. Apps can help, but they're not going to solve the fundamental challenge of changing your behavior.

What they can do is stop making it harder. They can learn what actually works for you. They can be less annoying and more helpful. They can treat you like a human being instead of a data point.

That's what I tried to build with Tonari. Whether it works for you, I honestly don't know. But it's working for me, and that's more than I could say about any other habit tracker I've tried.